Monday, June 15, 2009


For many years my wife Amalie blended half a banana each with orange juice to go with our morning breakfast. And therein lies a tale.

Several years ago we flew back to Washington, D.C. for the express purpose to see some of the Smithsonian museums. We had booked a hotel room a few blocks up the hill, and discovered that the facility had a dining room that served all meals. As a result we ate all our breakfasts there, and several dinners.

One evening during dinner a manager dropped by our table to see how we were doing, and we asked if we could have banana blended into our orange juice in he morning. “You can have anything you want,” he replied. Oh, good!

The following morning we told our waitress what we wanted. Perhaps this woman had gotten up on the wrong side of the bed, or something, but she snapped, “We don’t have a blender in the kitchen!” We explained what the manager had said the night before, and she stomped away muttering under her breath. We waited. And waited. And waited! Then we heard what sounded like a blender whirring away ... in the bar! And shortly after that we were delivered two decent size glasses of orange juice -- with banana. Ms Grumpy put them on the table -- grmmph! -- and stalked off. The rest of the breakfast was equally enjoyable.

Now for your first-meal-of-the-day enjoyment, here is the horribly complicated recipe:

Required equipment:
One kitchen (or bar) blender.
One knife sharp enough to cut a banana.
Two 8 ounce glasses.

14 oz orange juice, preferably chilled
One banana, peeled. (If you embarrass easily, you may want someone else to peel the banana). (One distinct advantage to this recipe is that the banana can be at most any stage of ripeness. I use those that are still a bit green on the ends, but Amalie used to add banana that was, to put it mildly, overripe. Still worked.

Take top off blender.
Pour in orange juice
Cut banana into several chunks. Not necessary if banana very ripe, in which case just squish in hands. Add to blender.
Put top on blender. That keeps fingers out of blender, and juicey banana in.
Turn on blender. I use LIQUEFY). Let run 20 to 30 seconds.
Turn off blender.
Remove top.
Pour into glasses. The juice; not the top.

Serves 2

Okay, you may think I’ve overdone it with the directions. Consider: Many years ago a Newcomers Club decided to publish a recipe book to be given to newcomers to the community.. The request went out to members to turn in their favorite recipe(s). One came in for a presumably fancy omelet that began: “First you make an omelet...”

Fun time --
(I heard this on the radio the other day).
Presume that a new movie has just been released, with the simple title CHILDREN. Now presume an announcer saying, “CHILDREN” (pause). “Now playing everywhere.”


There was a young lady named Stella,
Who said, come sit by me, young fella.
The mosquitos, they bite,
They are awful tonight,
And you smell just like Citronella!


  1. Now, now, where was her Southern hospitality? She must have been from out-of-area. Speaking of which, there was a congressional staffer a few years ago (a Yankee, let's skip the obligatory d* part) who charged the clerk at the Senate Cafeteria with sexual harassment because every time she saw him coming by, she called him honey or sugar.

    Dude. This is a SOUTHERN city!

    Which is why you should have gotten your oj-and-banana with a sure, honey, lemme help you with that!

  2. (Did I mention you that I'm a member of that exceedingly rare species? Someone actually born IN Washington, DC proper, not just passing through?)

  3. Ah yes, service with a smile! It's funny how you can be served pleasantly time and time again but the real grouches are the ones you remember. Who was the boss who said "Don't hire people and train them to be friendly, hire friendly people." Someone famous.

    As for your breakfast cocktail, I don't have a blender. I take my juice straight and banana on the side. I'm rugged that way.