Thursday, February 28, 2013

SCENERY

I don’t know where these scenes are, but I thought they were too beautiful to ignore.


































CHOICES

YOU CAN LIVE IN PHOENIX, ARIZONA WHERE.....
~ You are willing to park three blocks away because you found shade.

~ You can open and drive your car without touching the car door or the steering wheel.

~ You can attend any function wearing shorts and a tank top.

~ The 4 seasons are: tolerable, hot, really hot, and ARE YOU KIDDING ME??!!

~ You know that "dry heat" is comparable to what hits you in the face when you open your oven door.

YOU CAN LIVE IN  CALIFORNIA WHERE....
~ You make over $250,000 a year and you still can't afford to buy a house.

~ The high school quarterback calls a time out to answer his cell phone.

~ The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.


Wednesday, February 27, 2013

GETTING UP IN THE WORLD

I was asked if Pepper misses Chipper.  I don’t think so because the two of them did not get along well.




However, you may ask what Pep is doing on top of his cage.  Is he looking for his nemesis?  Don’t know, and Pepper isn’t saying.



Incidentally, you may ask how she got up there. That I can answer. She is an excellent climber.


Humor --

PHONE CALLS TO A TRAVEL AGENT

A woman wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with, "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts." Without trying to make her look stupid, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa."  Her response?  Click.

A senior was furious about a Florida travel package I had arranged for him.  I asked what was wrong with the Orlando vacation. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room.  I tried to explain that's not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state.  He replied, "Don't lie to me! I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state.”


Tuesday, February 26, 2013

SATURN AND SOME OF ITS MOONS

Discover magazine gave me a link to these photos taken by the Cassini space craft. I find them absolutely astonishing!  The text came with the photos.


Close-up of the Cassini Division.
Saturn has seven  main rings, named for the first seven letters of the alphabet (A through G). Between them are gaps and divisions, where moons and other debris orbit. Here the Cassini spacecraft looks between Saturn's A and B rings to see the gaps and ringlets contained within the Cassini Division.
On September 3, 2010 this image was taken when Cassini was a mere 276,000 miles from Saturn.




Here Cassini's cameras zoom in on two moons of Saturn: Rhea and Titan. In the foreground, craters are visible on the icy surface of Rhea. The moon is about 25 percent rock and 75 percent water ice. Giovanni Domenico Cassini, the spacecraft's namesake, was the first to discover this moon in 1672, which he named for the 
mother of the gods in Greek mythology.  Titan's hazy atmosphere appears as a smooth backdrop for its mini moon sister. Despite their close appearance, Cassini was still 808,000 miles from Rhea and 1.2 million miles from Titan when the image was taken on December 10, 2011.



This image is a false-color composite of three images showing the depths of the cloud layers. Cassini 
captured these views on January 13, 2008 from a vantage point some 810,000 miles away.  The arrow 
on the upper right edge of the image points to a particularly strong jet stream churning through Saturn's 
northern hemisphere. This jet stream, which appears as a thin orange line, moves west along a 
specific line of latitude on the planet's surface.





 Cassini snagged this photo from within Saturn's shadow while orbiting 500,000 miles from the planet's surface. The sun is behind Saturn here, backlighting its surface and rings in this color-enhanced photo.
Because the Earth is sandwiched between Saturn and the sun, we could never get such a view without the aid of the orbiting spacecraft. This photo op, on October 17, 2012, is a rarity even for Cassini. The last time the spacecraft was able to capture such an image was over six years ago, in September 2006.
Look closely to see two of Saturn's moons hiding in the lower left of the image. Enceladus hovers just 
below the rings and Tethys just below that.




Moon Trio
Taken at a distance of 1.3 million miles, this image shows Saturn dwarfing its three visible moons on 
December 7, 2011. The largest moon shown here is Tethys, which measures 660 miles across, or about 
the same distance as a drive along California's coast. Tethys is visible below the rings on the right side of the image.  On the left side of the image, below the rings, is Enceladus, a mere 313 miles across.  The third 
moon, Pandora, is barely visible in this view. With a diameter of only 50 miles, this moon appears as a 
small grey speck sitting atop the rings on the left edge of the image. It had to be brightened in relation 
to the rest of the image in order to be seen. A Pandora-length roadtrip would be little more than 
a drive from L.A. to the beach and back.



 The description said ‘quintet of moons’, but I can only find four.  Can you do better?




 The moon Dione compared to Saturn.


Humor

BIBLE STORIES --

STORY OF ELIJAH
The Sunday school teacher was carefully explaining the story of Elijah the Prophet and the false prophets of Baal. She explained how Elijah built the altar, put wood upon it, cut the steer in pieces, and laid it upon the altar. And then,Elijah commanded the people of God to fill four barrels of water and pour it over the altar. He had them do this four times. "Now," said the teacher, "can anyone in the class tell me why the Lord would have Elijah pour water over the steer on the altar?" A little girl in the back of the room started waving her hand, "I know! I know!" she said, "to make the gravy!"

LOT'S WIFE
The Sunday School teacher was describing how Lot's wife looked back and turned into a pillar of salt, when little Jason interrupted, "My Mummy looked back once, while she was driving," he announced triumphantly, "and she turned into a telephone pole!"

Monday, February 25, 2013

TREE TUNNELS

These are really quite beautiful.  The captions came with the photos.


Each spring, a peaceful street, in the German city of Bonn , 
transforms into an enchanting cherry blossom tunnel.



The picture was taken on the way up to Smuggler’s Notch, a Vermont state park.



Gingko biloba is a highly venerated tree in Japanese culture. Six ginkgo trees survived the Hiroshima bombing, continuing to grow despite facing so many challenges, and are still alive today. Therefore, the Japanese regard the gingko as “the bearer of hope”.



Tucked away in the county of Antrim, northern Ireland, these beautiful beech trees 
are thought to be around 300 years old.


The Sagano Bamboo Forest in Japan is located in Arashiyama, a nationally-designated historic site.



This spectacular jacaranda tree tunnel is located either in Johannesburg or Pretoria, South Africa



The Ashikaga Flower Park, Japan, is one of the best places to admire different varieties of wisteria, including double-petaled wisteria, giant wisteria and yellow, white, light pink or purple variants of wisteria.


BURMA SHAVE ROAD SIGNS

At intersections look each way
A harp sounds nice
but it's hard to play
Burma Shave

Both hands on the wheel
eyes on the road
That's the skillful driver's code
Burma Shave

The one who drives
when he's been drinking
Depends on you to do his thinking
Burma Shave

Car in ditch
Driver in tree
The moon was full
and so was he.
Burma Shave

Passing school zone
Take it slow
Let our little
Shavers grow
Burma Shave

Don’t stick your elbow
out so far
It may go home
in another car.
Burma Shave


Saturday, February 23, 2013

BIG DOGS

It is said that a dog is man’s best friend, but really now!  A few of these may be carrying things a bit too far.
See for yourself.


The sitter.  As long as the dog doesn't sit on the kid.





Giddiyup!



I don't like those little things yapping at me!



Just hanging out with the girls.



 Oooh, just gotta give you a hug.



 This is a lapdog?



 This guy could mop my floor just by rolling over once or twice.



 They can't hide the treats from me.



 I don't wanna go to the vet!



 Handy step stool.



 Zeus is my best friend.


Fun --

IT’S SAID…

~ A person starts cutting wisdom teeth as soon as he bites off more than he can chew.

~ Our national flower is the concrete cloverleaf.

~ Always go the extra smile.

~ Summer is the season that bugs us.

~ Why didn’t Noah just swat those two mosquitos?


Friday, February 22, 2013

A SAD GOODBYE



Yesterday I mentioned that Cliff had taken our beautiful, if not friendly Chipper to the vet. The vet doctor called me, and he  described a number of problems, including weight loss, a foot problem, and probable internal problems.  At Chip's age - 13 - he was close to the end of his life expectancy, so rather than have him suffer for another week, or month, or six months, I had the vet put him down.  As I thought about it, Chip may have been older than 13 years. When we bought him at the pet store, we thought he was a parakeet. Apparently, so did the store, for they charged us the parakeet price. In addition, he was in the same cage as the parakeets, but it seemed fairly obvious that he was an older bird.  At the time I thought perhaps a few months older, but perhaps it was more than that -- maybe a year.  That would explain why we never could train him.  When we took him to our vet, we were told that he was a Bourke's parrot. They are about the size of a 'keet, and come from central Australia.

It only took me about 5 minutes to write that previous paragraph, while I stopped to dry my eyes and blow my nose.  It can be difficult when one loses a family member.








Chip liked to get into Pepper’s cage and eat her food.  Mind you, it was identical to the food in his cage, but I suppose he liked to dine out.



















He really was a beautiful little guy.  We will miss him.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

OFF TO THE VET


Chipper, our little Bourke's parrot, was all hunkered down on the carpet the other evening, something I'd never seen him do before. Then all of a sudden he flew up to the counter where his cage is, but he had trouble getting up his ladder to the cage. (He won't let me touch him.)

The next morning I called the vet, but they couldn't take him that day.  Now Cliff has taken him for an early morning appointment.  I'll keep you up to date on the results.


Humor --

The Winter Boots
(Anyone who has ever dressed a child will love this)

Did you hear about the teacher who was helping one of her pupils put on his boots? He asked for help and she could see why. Even with her pulling, and him pushing, the little boots still didn't want to go on. By the time they got the second boot on, she had worked up a sweat.


She almost cried when the little boy said, 'Teacher, they're on the wrong feet.'She looked, and sure enough, they were. Unfortunately, it wasn't any easier pulling the boots off, than it was putting them on. She managed to keep her cool as, together, they worked to get the boots back on, this time on the correct feet.


He then announced, 'These aren't my boots.' She bit her tongue, rather than get right in his face and scream, 'Why didn't you say so?' like she wanted to. Once again, she struggled to help him pull the ill-fitting boots off his little feet.

No sooner had they got the boots off when he said, 'They're my brother's boots. But my Mom made me wear 'em today.' Now she didn't know if she should laugh or cry. But she mustered up what grace and courage she had left to wrestle the boots BACK onto his feet again.


Helping him into his coat, she asked, 'Now, where are your mittens?' He said, 'I stuffed 'em in the toes of my boots.'

She'll be eligible for parole in three years.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

TRAVEL IN COMFORT!

The hotelicopter!


It's HUGE!




Compare it to a regular chopper.



Up, up, and away!



The hotelicopter features 18 luxuriously-appointed rooms for adrenaline junkies 
seeking a truly unique and memorable travel experience.



Each soundproofed room is equipped with a queen-sized bed, fine linens, a mini-bar, coffee machine, 
wireless Internet access, and all the luxurious appointments you’d  expect from a flying five-star hotel.



Room service is available one hour after liftoff and prior to landing.



The engines are extra quiet so as not to bother travelers. Special body construction does not carry vibrations. Most modern navigation systems are on board. All is done for the utmost comfort and -- of course -- security.




However --


From Snopes:  Some April Fool’s pranks are so good that they continue to circulate and and snare the unsuspecting long after April 1 has come and gone. This “hotelicopter” hoax is another such example.

In late March 2009, as a marketing stunt intended to promote the launch of their revamped and renamed hotel search engine website, hotelicopter (previously known as VibeAgent) put up an April Fool’s prank on the web announcing “the world’s first flying hotel,” advertising a “Hotelicopter” featuring “18 luxuriously–appointed rooms”.

For those people who did not get the joke (and there were many of them), hotelicopter provided a hint in their blog when they launched their “real” site the following week:   Oh, and yes, we’re the folks behind the flying hotel of the same name. We were just having some fun, and had no idea it was going to blow up like it did. We’ve gotten about 1.5 million page and video views just in the last week, so thank you very much for all the attention and support, and hopefully we made you smile.



Tuesday, February 19, 2013

SPECTACULAR BIRDS

Birds are beautiful creatures.


Even the common house sparrow, like this one, has it’s own  simple beauty.



There are even some species of sparrows, such as this white crowned sparrow, that have their own uniqueness.



And then there are birds that simply take our breath away -- such as these.


Looks like a ballerina.



 Appears to be more tail than bird.



A many feathered splendor.



 This many colors was not my idea.



 I think I am unique.



 On tip toes.



  Wow! A Hummer with a fantail!



 Bad hair day.



  I rule the roost!


BURMA SHAVE ROAD SIGNS

Cautious rider to her reckless dear
Let's have less bull and more steer
Burma Shave

Speed was high, weather was not
Tires were thin, x marks the spot
Burma Shave

The midnight ride of paul for beer
Led to a warmer hemisphere
Burma Shave

Around the curve lickety-split
Beautiful car wasn't it?
Burma Shave

No matter the price
No matter how new
The best safety device
in the car is you
Burma Shave

A guy who drives a car wide open
is not thinkin' he's just hopin'
Burma Shave