A TISKET-- A CASKET

A man was walking his dog one foggy Halloween night. Suddenly, from behind him he heard: BUMP! BUMP! BUMP!

Walking faster, he looked back.  Through the fog he could see an upright casket.  It was banging its way down the middle of the street toward him:

BUMP!  BUMP! BUMP!

Terrified, the man began to run home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him:
BUMP! BUMP! BUMP!

He ran up to the door, fumbled with his keys, opened the door and rushed in. He slammed and locked the door behind him. However, the casket crashed through the door, with the lid of the casket clapping:  
Clappity-BUMP!  

Clappity-BUMP!

The terrified man ran up the stairs to the bathroom and locked himself in. His heart was pounding, his head was reeling, his breath was coming in huge gasps.  With a loud CRASH the casket broke down the bathroom door, bumping and clapping toward him:
Clappity-BUMP! 
Clappity-BUMP! 
Clappity-BUMP!

The man screamed and reached for something, ....anything! His hand closed around a bottle of cough syrup! Desperate, he threw the cough syrup at the casket, and

the coffin stopped!