BEAUTIFUL ANIMALS

Beautiful wildlife.  Comments are mine.

C'mon, ma, give me a ride!

Just strolling on the beach, holding hands, er, fins.

We're orangutans.  Any way you hold our picture is wrong.

Yes, I wuv you.  Just don't tell my mom.

Last one in is a rotten egg!

Yes?  What can we do for you?  We were having a discussion.

Meerkat choral society.

Aw, come play with me!

...And so I said to him, as one lemur to another ...

Just snoozin' in the sun.

Yeah!  We're twins.  What of it?

We're here for new overcoats.

Humor --
A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar. The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"

***
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

ODDLY SPECIFIC

These signs certainly do get specific.  My thanks to Diana.

Humor -
I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.

***
The six year old was having trouble adjusting to first grade.  At least twice a week the mother received a note from his teacher outlining his latest infraction.  Finally the mother laid it on the line.  “I don’t want any more notes from your teacher!”  Ok, mom,” he said.  “Are you going to tell her, or do you want me to?”

KNIGHT, KNIGHT

I was back at Avenidas this morning for the last of my required assessments, and I am now officially a participant.

For the third time, at lunch, they put me at the table with the other Don's (and a couple of other fellows.)  As the aid pushed my wheelchair over to that area, I heard her say that I would be at the Knight table.  That had me a bit puzzled, until they set up a round table for lunch.  Ah, the knights of the round table!  No armor, but we did get table settings.  And water.  And then we waited.  And waited.  And waited, which prompted me to say that perhaps they call it the knight table is that one has to wait 'til (k)night to get served.  Small laugh.  We did get served, eventually.

Humor --

Slept like a log last night........ Woke up in the fireplace.

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If you never want to see a man again, say, "I love you, I want to marry you, I want to have your children."  Sometimes they leave skid marks.
  Rita Rudner

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He has as much backbone as a chocolate eclair.
  Teddy Roosevelt

“YOU CAN STOP ...

using the medications,” said the dermatologist.  That was very good news to hear from him.  The antihistamines having me making me drowsy, and I’ve been moving around in a bit of a fog.  No mo!

That also means that now I can go back to Avenidas and not fall asleep in my wheelchair.

So let’s celebrate with a bit of humor --

"I said to the Gym instructor "Can you teach me to do the splits?" He said, "How flexible are you?" I said, "I can't make Tuesdays"

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What do you call a receptionist in a beauty salon?  A hair traffic controller.

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There are three kinds of people; those who can count, and those who cannot
  George Carlin

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What would men be without women?  Scarce, sir.  Mighty scarce.
  Mark Twain

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I’m all for computer dating, but I wouldn’t want my sister to marry one.
  Emo Phillips

NO TICKER TAPE

The Giants are having their victory parade today, and someone called it a ticker tape parade.  Uh, no.  Not a ticker tape parade.  Parade, yes, ticker tape, no.  Why not?  No more ticker tape machines; therefore, no more ticker tape.  Call it a confetti parade,if you like.  Doesn’t have the same ring to it.  Besides, where do you get confetti these days?  From your shredder, most likely, or go out and buy it.

For confetti throwers, there is an additional problem.  Most tall buildings in San Francisco have windows that don’t open.  So how do you litter the streets?  Ah, the problems of the ages.
***
I was sent a book of humor by one of you lovely people, so I'd better start sharing:

If in Hollywood you don't have a shrink, people think you're crazy.
 Johnny Carson

A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle.
  Florynce Kennedy


Funny cartoon --

UNUSUAL FORMATIONS

These photos are quite fascinating!

BRAGGING RIGHTS

If you didn’t know that the San Francisco Giants won the World Series Monday night, you do now!  Their first championship since they moved to S.F. more than 50 years ago.  But what cracked me up was John Madden on KCBS radio Tuesday morning.  He noted that he was watching TV following the game, with all the excited fans screaming and hollering for their team.  The TV announcers, said John, said these revelers had waited more than 50 years for this to happen.  “Naw, naw,” said Madden (he says ‘naw, naw’ rather than ‘no, no’),” not these 18 year old celebrants.  They didn’t wait no 50 years!”

ONE MORE HALLOWEEN STORY

Somehow I'm reminded of an incident that happened many years ago.  Our family was living in a flat in San Francisco.  The owner had the flat above us.  My “little” nephew was in junior high at the time, and still quite short, about maybe 5’4” or so, (he is now about 6'3") and with an unblemished complexion. 

He wanted to get dressed up for the Halloween parade that was about to start, but had no idea what to wear.  His mother came to the rescue.  She dressed him in one of her blouses and skirt, put makeup on his face, and did something about his hair, perhaps a scarf.  He was adorable!

The first thing he wanted to do was go upstairs and trick-or-treat our landlady.  So up he went, rang the bell, and when she answered the door, yelled, “Trick or Treat!”  “Okay”, said the landlady,  “but little girl, you’re not in costume.”  He never lived it down.



This video is amazing!  It had me wondering if there was a person inside the walrus suit.