ANIMATED ANIMALS

Here are some more fascinating animals from National Geographic.

I thought this was gonna be a formal affair

Don't sit down, please.

Two wrestlers and the referee, or

two dancers and the dance instructor.

I'm practicing being a bear rug

I see three heads, but three bodies?

Puns -

You feel stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
When an actress saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
Local Area Network in Australia - the LAN down under.
Every calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted - Taint yours and taint mine.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

IN DEEP WATER

THE DEEP
By Claire Nouvian

More extraordinary creatures of the  deep ocean.

Black-eyed squid    Depth:  2500 meters    Size:  about 35 cm

Spookfish        Depth:  4000- 2500 meters    Size:  20 cm

Boo!

Fanfin Esadevil    Depth:  700 - 3000 meters    Size:  25 cm, not including sensory filaments
Don't mess wit me!

  Football fish    Depth:   1000-4000 meters    Size: females up to 45 cm

Football?

Blacksnout seasnail       Depth:  200 - 1692 meters    Size:  17 cm

 Glowing sucker octopus    Depth:   700 - 2500 meters    Size:  up to 50 cm

Anglerfish        Depth: 1000 - 4000 meters    Size:  15 cm
Ain't I purdy?

  Munnopsis        Depth:  900 - 3000 meters    Size:  Body, 1-2 cm; legs, 15 cm
Lots of antennae

 Marrus orthocanna      Depth:  400 - 3000 meters    Size:  40 cm

Humor --

This is a story that is perfectly logical to all males:

A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping
for me and buy a quart of milk, and if they have eggs, get 6."

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 quarts of milk.

The wife asks him, "Why the heck did you buy 6 quarts of milk?"

He replied, "They had eggs."

ODD ENDS

Really!  I didn’t see it!  And I’m a prety good prof reder, too.  My editor spoted it, and aksed me abot it.  Do yu see whot I mean?

Google is my online home page.  When I went online Sunday morning, this is what I saw --

I’d been having a bit of a problem with my word processor, and could not figure out a way to solve it.  So I called Mac tech support (yeah, I’m a Mac user) and explained the problem.  This was a new one to the young lady, so she asked if I would wait a few minutes while she researched it.  Sure.  A couple of minutes later she came back and had me try something.  Didn’t work.  So she was off to look further during which time I fiddled again with it, and accidentally solved the problem.

When tech returned, she said she had discovered that the problem was rare, but had been seen by others.  The thing to do was ...  At which point I interrupted and said I’d fixed it.  And I described what I’d done.  Very simple.  There was silence at the other end, so I started to say something.  “Wait,” she said, “I’m writing it down.”  And then she said “Want a job?”


California has been WET lately. The wettest June in decades.  Someone has suggested that the name of the month should be Juneuary.  At least it didn’t rain on my birthday! 


Cartoon -

QUITE A BIRTHDAY WEEK!

I turned 81 on Thursday, but it was recognized all week.

I received cards by snail mail, email, delivered to the back door,  best wishes by phone, a four leaf clover from a friend in Ireland, had a long telephone chat with another friend in Ypsilanti, Michigan, had a tooth filled by the dentist (that was exciting),

had friends over to share Baskin-Robbins ice cream cake,

received a book, a box of candy, cookies, and Happy Birthday sung to me about a half dozen times over several days.

A lot of fun!

Humor -

A woman went to court and told the judge she wanted a divorce.  "Do you have any grounds?" the judge asked.  "Just two acres," she said.  "That's not it, lady; I mean do you have a grudge?"  "No, we park the cars in front of the house," she replied.  The judge was frustrated: "Does your husband beat you up?"  "No,” she said,”I get up before he does." "Then why do you want a divorce?!" the judge asked.
"Because," she confessed, “we just don't seem to communicate."

TIME TRAVEL?

As associate editor of our mobile home park magazine, I am responsible for several pages, including the flyer for the monthly social event.  So I was pleased when the person in charge of the July Fourth Potluck brought me a rough draft of what he wanted said.  Thank you, John.  A bit later I got around to reading the copy:

JULY 4TH POTLUCK AND HOTDOGS
Monday, July 4, 1911

I phoned him to say that I doubted I could make the event.  Why not?  I wasn't even born then.  When I told him why, he laughed and said he wasn't, either.I asked him if he had some sort of time travel involved.  Not that he knew of.  I don't even know if July 4 in 1911 was on a Monday.

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Tomorrow I'll tell all about the fun I had for my birthday.


Fun --

10 rations:
1 decoration

100 rations:
1 C-ration

2 monograms:
1 diagram

8 nickels:
2 paradigms

2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University
Hospital: 1 I.V. League

Animals from National Geographic

Some of these are pretty, and some pretty unusual.
Enjoy!

I'm pretty foxy.  Really!

No, you may not copy my hairdo!

Prepare for landing

Ain't I gorgeous?

Giddiyup!

Look out or I'll beat you with club!

Breakfast time!

Ohhh sayyy can you see ...

Charge!

I finally got a copy of the book that will help you understand women better.
 
Let me know if you need a copy!

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PLASTIC BAGS

While we in the U.S. are trying to get rid of plastic bags, the Europeans are going in the other direction and doing something creative.  Have a look.  No comments by me are necessary.

Humor -

ANGELS EXPLAINED BY CHILDREN

Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who's a very good carpenter.
                Jared, 8

All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn't  go for it.
                Antonio, 9

My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth.
                Lynn , 9

Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and  pets. And if they don't make the animals get better, they help the  child get over it.
                Vicki, 8

What I don't get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them.
                Sarah, 7