FIXIN’ THINGS

It has been said that bad things happen in three’s, and I have now had my share.  Last week my camera went on the sick list, and we sent it back to the manufacturer.  Turns out that by giving back the defective camera, I get a hefty discount on a new one that will cost very little more than the repair.

***
Several days ago Cliff took the van over to the car wash for its semi-annual bath.  (Oh, we really do that more than twice a year.)  But when he got back, he discovered that the right rear sliding door wouldn’t open.  “Is the door locked?” I asked.  Cliff checked, but no, that was not the answer.  So early this morning he drove it over to the shop to have it repaired.  It’s supposed to be ready this afternoon.  At least it’s clean.

***
No, not this afternoon. The problem is a broken door handle. They have to order parts that won’t be in until tomorrow morning. But Cliff has a dental appointment, so he will pick up the car and take it back on another day.

(Next day)  The shop called, and said the parts are in. Now Cliff can take the car back to get the job finished.

***
As if that were not enough, I’m having trouble with my internet connection. And what really makes it annoying is that the problem is intermittent. I’d be online when all of a sudden nothing moves.  I’d glance down at the modem and discover that one or two lights are out.  So I called my internet service provider (ISP, for you initial lovers), and after some fiddling around, it was decided that the phone jack filter needs replacing.  So it’s a good thing that Cliff picked up the car because he has now gone to pick up new filters.

Ah, new filter installed.  Everything works fine.


Fun time --

I figured you should have breakfast in bed on your birthday. 

Can you reach the stove okay?

HELPERS

... of all kinds.  Gee it’s amazing the kind of help one can get these days!  Take a look!

Fun --

LAUGHABLE LIMERICKS

            There was a young maiden, a Sioux,
                 As tempting as fresh honeydioux.
                 She displayed her cute knees
               As she strolled past tepees,
              And the braves, they all hollered "Wioux-Wioux!"

                            A wonderful bird is the pelican;
                                 Its beak can hold more than its belly can.
                                 It can hold in its beak
                                  Enough food for a week.
                              I’m darned if I know how the hell he can.

            A maiden at college, Miss Keyes,
               Weighted down with BA's and Lit. D's,
               Collapsed from the strain;
               Said her doctor, "It's plain
              You're killing yourself by degrees!"

                            A tutor who tooted a flute,
                                Tried to tutor two tooters to toot.
                                Said the two to the tutor,
                              "Is it harder to toot, or
                              To tutor two tooters to toot?"

            A fussy old widow named Pease
                 Thought her home was infested with fleas;
                So she used gasoline,
                And her form was last seen
              Sailing over the tops of the trees

MAMMALS --2 AND 4-LEGGED

Here’s a variety of photos you may enjoy.

Wanna play ball?

Follow me, ladies.

Say that again!

It's my toy, but you can borrow it.

Here we come, ma!

Gee, strong heart beat. You in good shape.

Schlurp, schlurp! Ooooh, dat tastes good!

All set for the cold weather.

Yeah, my tongue's hangin' out.  I need sumpin to eat.

Fun --

SOME THINGS THAT ANNOY

People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is…where the heck is yours?

People who are willing to get up to search the entire room for the T.V remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

When people tell me, "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too." Of course! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

When people say, "It's always the last place you look." Naturally! Why would you keep looking after you've found it?

When people say, while watching a film, "Did you see that?" I didn’t pay $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the darned floor!

THE GREAT OUTDOORS

Here are a number of photographs depicting the variety of outdoor scenes. Some are natural; others are man made.

Church in Norway

Ladybower reservoir, England

Libyan desert oasis

Mosaic steps, San Francisco

Seaside deck, Hawaii

Tree House, exterior

Tree house, interior

World's largest solar powered ship, U.K.

Tree top suspension bridge, Vancouver, Canada

Molokini crater, Hawaii

Humor --

A husband was in BIG trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary. "Tomorrow," his wife angrily told him, "there had better  be something in our driveway that goes from zero to 200 in under five seconds!"
The next morning, the wife looked outside and saw a small package in the driveway.   She brought it inside, opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Along with it was a card that read ... "Happy Anniversary Sugar Muffin".

ALBINO HUMMINGBIRD

The text came with the photos.

A rare treat . . . an albino hummingbird! Here is something that is seldom seen and almost NEVER photographed.

Fifteen-year-old photographer Marlin Shank was fortunate enough to capture several images 

of a rare albino ruby-throated hummingbird while in a park in Staunton, VA.

Very high quality photographs for such a fleeting subject...

In flight!

Amazing photography when you consider that the bird's wings are constantly moving!

Humor --

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting.  It’s called “Being Hungry!”

It’s bad news when you get to the age where your back goes out more than you do.

I’m at an age where my secrets are safe with my friends.  They can’t remember them, either.

Then there is the fellow who insists he wears the pants in his family.  Maybe so, but his wife tells him which pair.

At my age rolling out of bed in the morning is easy.  Getting up off the floor is another story.

I need a six month vacation -- twice a year.

If you’re always looking over your shoulder, pretty soon you’ll bump into something.

EAT YOUR VEGETABLES ...

...takes on a whole new meaning.  Have a look.  You’ll see what I mean.

...before your veggies eat you!

You are here.

This bird is the berries!

And 'Z' stands for zebra

Fun -

Think about this..., No one ever says "It's only a game"  when his team is winning.

Be careful reading the fine print. There's no way you're going to like it.

The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have thousands of old ladies running around with tattoos?

Money can't buy happiness -- but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Corvette than in a Yugo.

After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching in every joint, you are probably dead