SOME CLARIFICATION - MAYBE

Last week when I was hospitalized with chest pain, the ER doctor said that all signs pointed to the heart.  Well, actually, no.  Both of the blood tests came back with negative results as to heart damage.  The following day my cardiologist came to see me, and said he really doubted that the pain was due to the heart.  I was also visited by my primary care physician (that used to be 'family doctor,' but I guess that's too short a title) and my pulmonologist. Did not see my urologist, nor my neurologist.  I have enough 'gists' to start a clinic.  No one had any idea what caused the pain.

This morning I saw my chiropractor, and told him all about my adventure.  He offered a reason -- namely that my ribs were a little out of alignment.  He went on to say that that kind of problem can mimic a heart attack with chest pain, pain in the jaw, and down the arm.  He went on to poke around my ribs.  "This hurt?"  "Ow! YEAH!"  And then he made the adjustment, which seemed to help a lot.  Too bad they don't have chiropractors in hospitals.

How about something funny --
Painting the Church

There was a painter named MacGregor who was very interested in making a penny where he could, so he often thinned down his paint to make it go a wee bit further. As it happened, he got away with this for some time, but eventually one church decided to do a big restoration job on the outside of one of their biggest buildings..

MacGregor put in a bid, and, because his price was so low, he got the job. So he set about erecting the scaffolding,  setting up the planks, and buying the paint and, yes, I am sorry to say, thinning it down with turpentine.  Well, MacGregor was up on the scaffolding, painting away, the job nearly completed, when suddenly there was a horrendous clap of thunder, the sky opened, and the rain poured down washing the thinned paint from all over the church and knocking MacGregor clear off the scaffold to land on the lawn among the gravestones, surrounded by telltale puddles of the thinned and useless paint.

MacGregor was no fool.  He knew this was a judgment from the Almighty, so he got down on his knees and cried: "Oh, God, Oh God, forgive me; what should I do?"
And from the thunder, a mighty voice spoke..

"Repaint!  Repaint!  
 And thin no more!"