ALL HUMOR DAY

Let’s just have a good laugh today!

WHY COMPUTERS SOMETIMES CRASH!
(Per Dr. Seuss)

If a packet hits a pocket on a socket on a port, and
the bus is interrupted at a very last resort, and the
access of the memory makes your floppy disk abort,
then the socket packet pocket has an error to report.

If your cursor finds a menu item followed by a dash,
and the double-clicking icon puts your window in the
trash, and your data is corrupted cause the index
doesn't hash, then your situation's hopeless and your
system's gonna crash!

If the label on the cable on the table at your house,
says the network is connected to the button on your
mouse, but your packets want to tunnel to another
protocol, that's repeatedly rejected by the printer
down the hall.

And your screen is all distorted by the side effects
of gauss, so your icons in the window are as wavy as
a souse; then you may as well reboot and go out with a
bang, 'cuz sure as I'm a poet, the sucker's gonna hang.

When the copy on your floppy's getting sloppy in the
disk, and the macro code instructions is causing
unnecessary risk, then you'll have to flash the memory
and you'll want to RAM your ROM, and then quickly turn off the computer and be sure to tell your Mom!

***

The Quaker farmer was in bed one night when he heard noises downstairs. He picked up his rifle and stepped out on the landing just in time to see a burglar stuffing things into a sack. “I wouldn’t hurt thee for the world, my friend”, said the farmer, “but thee standest where I am about to shoot!”

***

Sometimes, we just need to remember what the rules of life really are: You only need two tools - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.

Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You get another chance.

Be really nice to your family and friends; you never know when you might need them to empty your bedpan.