UP, UP, And...

... going nowhere.  Since I cannot get up and down steps, I have an elevator that takes me from the back porch down to ground level (and back up when coming home -- all of about 28 inches).

The other day Cliff had picked me up at Avenidas, and brought me home.  As he always does, he pulled my wheelchair out of the back of the van, I sat down, and he pushed me onto the lift.  Cliff pushed the UP button, but nothing happened.  He checked the electric connection, and tried once more.  Again, nothing happened.   Yikes!  And it was cold!  Now he was going to try to guide me up the back steps.  No go!  Now my legs were starting to give out, and I sat down on the steps.  That’s where Cliff had a brilliant idea.  He got behind me, and pulled me all the way up to the porch and up on my wobbly feet.  And while I was hanging onto something to keep from falling, he went in and got my walker.  That worked!  And after a nice hot cup of tea, I was back among the living.  As we so often say, growing old is not for the faint of heart.

Oh, the problem.  Turned out to be a circuit breaker.  Easily remedied.

How about a couple of funny cartoons to lighten things up --

“GET YOUR KICKS ...

...on Route 66.  It winds from Chicago to L.A. more than two thousand miles all of the way ...”

And when you get down into New Mexico and Arizona, there is some pretty amazing scenery to be seen.  For example --

 

More Biblical explanations by children, mis-spellings and all.

MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.

THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.

SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES.

SIMPLY BEAUTIFUL, part 1

Some of these are rather unusual.  Have a look --

Under a glacier

I think this is a footbridge in Vancouver, B.C.

Almost looks like a Hollywood set.

Oooh! That looks inviting.

Looks like someone (something?) swimming in the moat.

Water in an underground cavern

I've no idea where this is.

Fogged in

Cable car ride, anyone?

And a bit of humor --

These are classified ads.

FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER.
8 years old, Hateful little bastard.
Bites!

FREE PUPPIES
1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.

FREE PUPPIES.
Mother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd. Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.

WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE .
Worn once by mistake.
Call Stephanie.

FOR SALE BY OWNER.
Complete set of Encyclopaedia Britannica, 45 volumes.
Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

IN THE SHOP

I know.  I haven't been here for a few days.  Had the computer in the shop for a lube and oil change.
Actually I was trying to do something, and discovered that it could not be done on my computer.  And I really wanted to do it; namely, burn some photos to a DVD.

I've been burning CD's for some time now, and it never even occurred to me that I could not do DVD's, so what does one do in that situation?  Well, seemed that I had two options -- 1, forget about it, or 2, buy a new computer. I went with number 2, and had to wait a couple of days while they transferred my data to the new computer.  Got it last evening.

So today I have been busy finding out what it is that I don't know.  I found out, for instance, that the new operating system does not support my old version of Photoshop, so I've ordered an upgrade.  And a couple of other programs need replacing.

And while I was about it, and there in the store, I bought something else.  Heavens knows why.  It doesn't cook breakfast, or make the bed, or do the laundry.  Well, it's a computer monitor -- a BIG computer monitor.  Thirty-two inches wide.  Yes, it does fit on my computer table.  And it does come with a camera, microphone, and speakers, along with several input ports to add to the ones on the computer itself.  When I get my new version of Photoshop, I'll put up a picture.

"Enough with the blather," you may be thinking.  "Where's the humor?  Where's the fun?"


Hold on while I see what I can find --

NUTRITIOUS

The other day I filled my shampoo bottle, and when I took the new bottle out of the cabinet, I had to look twice to be sure I had the right thing.  Well, it did say “Fortifying Shampoo”.  However, as I read further, I discovered some interesting information.  And I quote:

               “TRIPLE NUTRITION
                Extra nourishing cream
                  3 nutritive fruit oils
                Olive, Avocado, Shea”

Well, that had me wondering -- was I supposed to eat it, drink it, or pour it on my hair?  Sounds delicious.  And there was another conundrum -- how to pronounce “Shea”.  So I Googled it.  And came up with not one, not two, not three, but four optional pronunciations:

Shay - as in ‘one hoss”, or the stadium with the same spelling.
Shee - as in ‘shee whiz, or shee said.
Shay-uh, as in ... as in ... “Shay, uh, ya got a minute?
Shee-uh, as in.. She, uh, said...

Pick one.  Apparently you can’t go wrong.

Incidentally, I did see something in my search that mentioned that Shea Butter is edible.  No matter how you pronounce it.

***

Elaine, who is a good friend, had this to say about the video she sent me:

I grew up on a farm until I was 5, and had a very tiny Shetland pony of my own, that I rode to the one room country school house, in Nebraska…..And this is something that you definitely do not do, even if you know the horse well.  It made me laugh.  I hope you get a chuckle too.
Elaine

CORPORATE LOGOS

We see corporate logos every  day. Did you ever look closely at them? Scroll down and be  surprised.

  Do you see the arrow  between the “E” and “x” ?? I had never noticed this before.  

  2nd and 3rd “t’s” are two  people sharing a tortilla over a bowl of salsa

 Probably the world’s most  famous bike race. The “R” in “Tour” is a cyclist – the yellow circle 

is the front wheel of the bicycle.

  The arrow probably means Amazon has everything from A to Z ??

 There is a bear if you look closely at the image of the Matterhorn . Toblerone chocolate bars
originated in Bern, Switzerland, whose symbol is the bear.  

Do you see “31” embedded in the “B R”? Thirty one-derful flavors !!

  Northwest Airlines. The circle is a compass. Guess which direction the arrow in the upper left
corner (or beginning of “W”) is pointing ? (north west). 

(To me, that triangle is pointing in three different directions.  And it took me a while to see the "W").

See the gorilla and lioness?  (I do!  I do!)

 Smiley face is also a “g”, as in “Goodwill”

Angels as Explained By Children

All angels are girls because they gotta wear dresses and boys didn't go for it.
-Antonio, age 9

My angel is my grandma who died last year. She got a big head start on helping me while she was still down here on earth.
-Ashley ~ age 9

Some of the angels are in charge of helping heal sick animals and pets. And if they don't make the animals get better, they help the child get over it.
- Vicki , age 8

What I don't get about angels is why, when someone is in love, they shoot arrows at them.
- Sarah , age 7

UNUSUAL PAIRINGS

On an island off the coast of China, a little macaque nestles its head on a dove. Three months before, after the macaque had strayed from its mother, it was found and taken in by the staff of an animal protection centre. It soon became friends with the white dove, which had also been adopted by centre staff. For two months they ate together and slept together, before both were released back into the wild.

When piglet Paulinchen was found stranded from her family, Katjinga the rhodesian ridgeback took to her and treated her like her own pup. After a few days Paulinchen was returned to her mother, but she and Paulinchen still have a quick nuzzle when they see each other

In Bali, a lonely macaque cares for a stray kitten. The young male macaque would groom, hug and nuzzle his feline friend, and the kitten was content to be carried around by him

At the Taman Safari Zoo in Indonesia, one-month-old Sumatran tiger twins and a pair of baby orangutans shared a room in the zoo’s nursery. The orangutans and the tigers became the best of friends during daily play times and spent naptime cuddling and nuzzling. They were separated when they were five months old

Themba the elephant lost his mother when he was just six months old. Vets found a surrogate for Themba - a sheep named Albert. They had a bit of a rocky start, but once they accepted each other, were inseparable until Themba sadly died from a twisted intestine.

A six-month-old greyhound puppy named Torque and a baby owl named Shrek formed a bizarre friendship at Ringwood Raptor and Reptile Centre in the New Forest in August 2008. Torque became Shrek's adoptive father after the young owl was taken away from her mother for her own protection

These two affectionate housemates, Lucky the cat and Coco the cockatoo, love to chill out together. Coco sticks her tongue in the little cat's ear, or kneads and nuzzles her when she rolls on to her back

On a farm in Texas, a pitbull named Sharky, a cat named Max and a brood of chicks hang out together on a warm afternoon. Sharky loves to protect small furred and feathered creatures

Biblical explanations by children, mis-spellings and all.

MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE  RED  SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS .

THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS

THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.

THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY.

CUTE DOGS

I’m real!  Honest!

Yeah, it don’t look like it, but I’m watching you!

First it’s the Tango ...

Then it’s the Cha Cha Cha.

Somebody give me a push!

I smell food!

Sometimes I get all wrapped up in myself.

If they put me on an all white blanket, and closed my eyes, I might disappear.

My nose?  What about my nose?

Humor --

Angels as Explained By Children - continued

When an angel gets mad, he takes a deep breath and counts to ten. And when he lets out his breath again,  somewhere there's a tornado.
-Reagan, age 10

Angels have a lot to do and they keep very busy. If you lose a tooth, an angel comes in through your window and leaves money under your pillow. Then when it gets cold, angels go south for the winter.
-Sara, age 6

Angels live in cloud houses made by God and his son, who's a very good carpenter.
-Jared, age 8